Star Wars Pre Pre Trailer Débuts As Flick Book

Blink and you'll miss Mon Mothma

Blink and you’ll miss Mon Mothma

JJ Abrams has launched a pre pre trailer for Star Wars: The Force Awakens in the form a flick book drawn by Jett Lucas. Fans have been queuing for 3 days straight outside Mann’s Chinese Theatre for their turn to see Jett Lucas flick his way through his interpretation of some key scenes which he has drawn in biro on an old, Lucasfilm branded, Post-it note block.

The flick book, which has a runtime of 3.8 seconds, is said to feature flashes of key scenes but no one knows what they may be as before it can be watched fans much sign a non-disclosure clause in their own blood.

Long-time Star Wars fan Clint Planetslayer (formerly Dan Edwards) said that it was a transcendent experience. “I can’t tell you what I saw or Jett Lucas will take my soul but I can tell you how I felt about it. I am complete in a way that I never realised it was possible to be. I wish all of humanity could know the joy I currently hold in my heart as it would be the end of all wars and intolerance.”

Disney’s Executive Vice President of Emotional Manipulation, Anne Incider, said that the sense of exclusivity in viewing the flick book was what had made so many fans so eager to see it. “If there is one thing that Star Wars fans love it is exclusive content you have to go to great lengths to see. We talked over a few ideas such as having the trailer be available as a 3D view-master disc that you could only see if you went to a particular Denny’s in Utah.”

When asked about Jett Lucas’ involvement Incider says that it was important to JJ Abrams. “JJ was keen to keep George around as there are some people who still think that he is actually relevant to Star Wars. He also wanted to have Jett closely involved to show the passing of the torch to the next generation. Plus Jett had finished emptying the bins and cleaning the gum off of Mark Hamill’s shoes so he was at a loose end.”

Entertainment Journalist Medcalf Van Cleef said this was the latest in a long tradition of film studios cocking about with trailers. “The trailer used to be about getting you to want to watch the film. These days’ studios care more about internet buzz and will do anything to get it. I hear that for Prometheus 2 there is going to be an exclusive video of the meeting to discuss what to include for the pre trailer before the trailer. This will include a 5 minutes section where Ridley Scott goes for a loud and aggressive shit while insisting on leaving the stall door open so he doesn’t miss anything.”

There is no word yet on when the full official trailer will be released but Anne Incider said that they would look to pick just the right moment. “Ideally you should look out for the full trailer on the day that Warner Brothers try to announce something that they laughably think might be of interest to anyone. That is when we shall strike!”

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